3:10 AM Musings

They say somethings are better left unsaid

Sometimes I'm not so sure

they say the best things in life come free.

You know whats the worst?

When you pay for the same things

Whats wrong in giving it all away?

The mind takes over the soul, the heart

That's what happens when you become world wise

Oh what I would not give to get back the innocence of the youth



What happens when you know that across the fence

There is something better

Just out of your reach

What stops you?

The world?

Not likely you know….

Its you, yourself…cowards that we humans tend to be



And yes, maybe you did give it all away

But I can't be sure…

Nice guy…thanks for being so..but…

I can never be sure

I hope you know


Now…did I give it all away?




- Pooja Guha

Jigsaw & Olive Theory

Landed in my home city Friday evening. The balmy air, the chaos in the streets, the green lights and colors from the Congress win here saturating the air. The joy at seeing the fam after 6 months over whelming me! The familiar car...The bed...The smells...and, my favorite, the balcony. Biryani from one of my favorite places greets me at the dinner table.

The Limbo: Problem about having a better half who fits so snugly in your life, almost like a glove you always knew would fit like a dream, is that even when you are overjoyed or overwhelmed or just in one of your happy places is that you'll end up finding a moment when you suck your breath in sharply because you know the better half is missed. Not a sad moment. Just a genuine and important realization. It's like breathing. You know you are breathing but sometimes your mind will wander into the vicinity of the mechanism of breathing and for a few moments you will breathe consciously. Ever had that happen to you? Well, it's a lot like that.

It's only uncomfortable when I sleep. When you know that you fit like a jigsaw puzzle. Perfect. Then in a few moments you start breathing in rhythm. Much like walking with your best friend. You will always end up walking in the same rhythm. After tossing and turning for sometime, the fatigue in me found sleep.

Fitting Like A Jigsaw: Not just physically but people tend to fit like jigsaws. We do. You know like Lily & Marshall's Olive Theory? If you don't know let me give you a super quick explanation. Marshall hates olives but Lily loves them. Perfect Balance :)

In our case it's Pizza's. I eat the pizza but I hate the hard crust. Mr. B conveniently picks every single one of them and eats them. Perfect Balance again. And PDA. Mr. B is totally into PDA. I wasn't too into it, though. Turns out he has enough PDA enthusiasm to get rid of my PDA-awkwardness. And Chillies. I will pick up all the chillies from his plate because I love spicy or hot food. Perfecting the fine art of balancing. Except when it comes to you naturally like it was always meant to be.

Here's hoping every one of you have the other piece of the Jigsaw with you.

The Chinese Connection

So, you work your ass off. And there comes a point in the day when you think your brain is going to shut down, and you are going to pass out from just looking at another number, calculation or Excel sheet. Enter Mr. Ciggy. With Friends. A whole major discussion on pointless nonsensical things happen in the stair case, below the No Smoking sign. Noooo, we're not breaking any rules. Living on the EDGE, ya'll!

Except, when you are hanging out with a bunch of people who are what they are, you know, work is always snafu type? These particular lose-your-mind points in the day happen at least 4 or 5 times. And then we gather the whole lot and trudge towards our destination, all the while giving mental hi fives to each other about how we'll be living on the edge for like 10 mins!

But this is not about those smoke breaks. Well, it is sort of but not in it's entirety. You see, when you're me stuff happens - like you trip on air, forget your work badge everyday for a week, get locked out of your own house etc etc. So my friend, V noticed that whenever we tried to live on the edge in the staircase we'd be ALWAYS accompanied by some Chinese guy or group, invariably.

And sure enough, every time I walked to the staircase and was about to light my cig, there he'd come. I'm not saying they like me or any such thing. It's just that they are THERE...all the time. And sometimes even when I'm alone. This one day, all these guys were standing at the staircase waiting for someone to come along with a light because they so conveniently forgot to bring it. With no luck of course. As soon as I walked in... lo behold...that Chinese guy walked in too...a light in hand. I'm really starting to believe in this connection, damn!

V says it's because I'm short. And India is beside China. And he thinks when God was in his 'Give These Guys Some Freaking Location' mode he was throwing people down, practicing his aim and all. Which is frankly ridiculous. So all in all he threw me down to be put in China but he'd not mastered his aim yet...so I ended up in India. That's just dumb, but I have to say that's a hell of a lot of imagination!

My Plight These Days...

The BF and I need to stop on the beer!

Shawty!

Did I tell you I am short? Like Super Short? Well, I am. Also, I love being short. I'll tell you why being short is the best thing that can happen to you.

1. Leg Room: Ever struggled with having no leg room in cars, flights etc? Doesn't happen to me! I could very well sit with my legs crossed on a chair and be very...very comfortable.

2. Boys: You will never have to worry about falling in love with a boy who is shorter than you. But, ofcourse, there is not guarantee for falling in love with a boy who's shorter than your expectation! :)

3. Engulfing Hug: If you're tall, you'll never know what it truly means to be engulfed in somebody's arms. Being enveloped in his arms will always elude you.

4. That Smile:  When a boy look down at you and smiles that smile. There is something protective, something exclusively loving about it.

5. Skipping Queues: Skipping Queues because they think you're a cute little shawty!

See? It's FUN! :)

Of Laughs & Excuses

Laugh: You're short. You can't reach the top shelf for the frying pan you absolutely need. You call your boyfriend. He does a laugh that exudes so much love that you contemplate keeping all of your utensils in that single top shelf :)

Excuses: You're short. You don't need that saucepan in that top shelf. But you will pretend that you do just so he would come to help you, away from everyone else.

"Did You Know That You Are My Left Phalange?"

Of Quarter Life & Rants...

I turned 25 this May 2. Remember how I said that birthdays stressed me out? Well, I thought this birthday was going to take the cake for sure, what with all the over emphasis that people lay on turning 25 and the expectations we overload ourselves with. Well, guess what nothing of that sort happened! Because my Fab & Out-Of-This-World Boyfee decided that he's gonna change some rules and make this a stress-free, fun-overload day.

Result: Copious amounts of alcohol is still running through all of our blood vessels. It's a miracle that none of our livers cried out for a transplant. And while most people have one surprise birthday bash...I had TWO! I told you Mr. B was changing them rules, hell yeah!

And, no I wasn't stressed. Far from it! I wasn't regretting a moment of anything in my life. I mean, I was surrounded by people who understood me, were like me, and didn't know shit about what to do with life. Hell no, no 'crisis' there! I love my friends, I LOVE Mr. B for knowing exactly what to do and how to do it.

Also, while we were in the throes of celebrating my quarter life The U.S.A decided, 'What the hell, it's a Sunday night, let's make this world a better place and hunt down Osama...kill him, in fact!' I'm happy for the world in general if that happened, though I have to say I'm still kinda skeptical there... I mean no real pictures, no real information except 'Justice has been done.' Whatever, I'm not saying too much. Because it was more than just a manhunt for a lot of people. One friend of mine sat down and prayed and cried for her room-mate when she heard this. It really was a lot more than a man hunt.

Also, I have a Rant to get rid of. I'm really with all of my mighty (or not) existence hating on a girl. Just because, she's so fucking desperate! I mean can you leave your ex ALONE, woman? I really want to call her all kinds of badwords (oh yeah, I could give any one a run for their money) but I promised I wouldn't. And usually, I don't break promises. I swear on my motherfucking existence I will slap the fucking daylights out of her if I ever see her. No, sweetheart (for the want of a badword), your blog entries DO NOT ensure your ex running back to you. And, if blog entries are all it takes for him to go running back to her...well, that'd be the Armageddon of your fucking life.